Not to state the obvious here, but your texting style says a whole lot about your personality — it’s often how you form connections with people you just met or are getting to know, and how you build relationships in between hanging out with the ones you love. With that in mind, the reverse is also true — and you may be surprised at what your Enneagram says about your texting style. Not only can your type offer insight into when, how, and why you text, but even into the subtleties of your messages (like how many emojis you use).
Each Enneagram type has a “default” style of texting, which reflects their core motivations, needs, fears, and desires. And the thing is, there are no “good texters” and “bad texters” within the Enneagram. Every type has their own unique strengths — for example, some are more reliable in terms of responding, while others can be counted on for more warm and fuzzy messages.
Regardless of which Enneagram number you are, it can be helpful to know how your type affects your texting style. Not only will you likely gain some insight into any communication-related challenges you’re currently facing, but you may also start to observe some possible areas for improvement. So, whether you’re the type to frequently leave people on read or flood your convos with GIFs, here’s what you need to know about how your Enneagram informs your texting habits.
Ones are all about getting it right — and that includes the texts you send. So, you likely won’t get back to someone over text until you’ve figured out the perfect response. Considering how practical you are, it should come as no surprise that your texts are usually more straightforward and matter-of-fact. You’re more likely to text someone to clarify your weekend plans than to send them a silly meme or wax poetic about your love of Billie Eilish.
If there’s one type you can depend on to respond quickly to your texts, it’s the Two. You’re quick to get back to people in part because you’re too empathetic to leave them hanging, and also because you’re so eager to connect. You’re always looking for ways to make someone else’s life easier or better somehow, so if someone texts you with a question or a problem, you won’t waste any time offering up a caring, compassionate, and helpful reply. You’re also known to check in on people regularly via text just to make sure they’re OK.
Your texts typically have a warm, caring tone, and are peppered with plenty of compliments and validation. You’re also super generous with your use of emojis (especially hearts, applause, and anything else that displays affection and encouragement).
Ambitious Threes are known for grinding (and often with a side hustle to boot), so your messages tend to have an energetic, action-oriented tone. You’re also witty and charming AF — the texts you send are sure to inspire a smirk or a smile.
Threes are excellent at sensing what their recipient wants and shifting the message to make sure it’s heard and well-received. Since your type tends to be future-focused, much of your language will revolve around upcoming plans and goals, like, “We should totally watch that this weekend!” or “When can we try that new tapas place?”
As an emotionally-driven and individualistic Four, you’re the most likely of all the Enneagram types to text someone just because. But you won’t just say, “Hey, thinking of you” — you’ll find a way to connect in a creative or unique way, such as by sending a link to a song that reminded you of them, or by writing an incredibly descriptive message about what you’re dreaming of doing the next time you hang out.
TBH, your texts sometimes read like straight-up poetry (and at times, a novella). You have an immense appreciation for beauty and the arts and are known for using metaphors, imagery, and flowery language to illustrate your thoughts and feelings.
The M.O. of the Five is to intellectually understand the world in order to feel more secure. That explains why your texts may revolve around questions that you know will reveal info about the recipient. As a Head Center type, you’re not one to send mushy-gushy or emotionally revealing texts and in your opinion, emojis are straight-up useless.
While your messages may come across as somewhat distant and formal, that’s just because your way of getting close to someone is sharing knowledge, not your feelings. If someone puts you on the spot, you may need some time to process your emotions and thoughts before getting back to them. BTW — you absolutely despise small talk, and texting is no exception.
Texting can be a minefield for Sixes because you’re prone to looking for and even sensing hidden motives where there are none — and obviously, misunderstandings are even more likely with this particular mode of communication. That won’t stop you from overanalyzing every text you get (and send), though. You’re super careful with the language you use and will take extra time to make sure you’ve nailed the right message and tone for the specific person you’re communicating with. Your texts will often be brimming with words like “possibly,” “maybe” and others that suggest uncertainty. There’s a good chance you’ll re-read the text even after you’ve sent it, too.
Sixes crave structure and predictability because it makes them feel safe, and that may come across in your texting habits. You’re pretty consistent with when, how, and why you reach out to someone.
“OMG, you’ll never believe what just happened to me.” As an enthusiastic storyteller, that’s generally how your texts start if you’re initiating a conversation. You’re also upbeat and excitable AF, and it sure as heck shows it in your texts (think double texting, caps, emojis, and exclamation points). There’s nothing you love more than sharing whatever new idea just popped into your head.
In addition to being fun-loving, you can also be a tad flighty at times. Sometimes you may neglect to get back to someone — since you’re so focused on the present, you’d typically rather soak up whatever adventure you’re experiencing than type out an obligatory response to someone. You may have even started typing out a response and then got sidetracked by something else. You’re also always bouncing from thing to the next, so you’ve also been known to occasionally drop off the face of the planet for a few days. Once you resurface, though, your high-energy, entertaining communication style is bound to win the other person over.
What you see is what you get with Eights. In terms of texting, that means your messages are usually super straightforward and honest. No one will ever have to guess how you feel, because you’ll just say it. Unlike Sixes, your messages are void of uncertain language — due to your high confidence level and assertiveness, you’re more likely to make a statement than ask a question.
Eights are Gut Types, and that means you can react quickly and with intense emotion. You’re also not afraid to confront someone or call someone out over text. Still, the people who are close to you have probably come to appreciate your straight-shooting communication style.
You’re known as The Peacemaker for a very good reason: You’re motivated by a need to maintain harmony at all costs. That shows in your text convos, too, because you’ll do whatever it takes to prevent things from escalating or getting heated. For example, you’ll make it a point to validate something you don’t necessarily agree with, just to avoid conflict.
Your tone is generally gentle, calm, and encouraging, and you take great care in trying to figure out the best way to say something without offending the person. Thoughtful phrases, expressions of gratitude, and a healthy dose of emojis to demonstrate that your message is non-threatening — these are all hallmarks of your texting style.